I love.

I love how I feel super dorky in these flowered capri pajama pants. I love how cold and sweet this orange peach mango juice is, and how cute it is in the little clear plastic cup I have on my desk. I love Bananagrams and how when I close my eyes, I see tiles and they just start making words on their own, and words appear in my mind and start rearranging into other words, and it makes me feel like I have this mega vocab brain. I don’t love a lot of things tonight, I’m feeling a little melancholy again, but I’ve decided that I want to immerse myself in lovely thoughts, so I’m going to use my blog time to do that. And I hope you’ll share some of the things you love lately? Even the silly things?

I love my in-window air conditioner and my new socks that are so many colors, vibrant and earthy. I love my newfound style and how comfortable I often am. I love the nights where shuffle seems to do everything it’s supposed to and all of the songs sound kind of sweet and possessing pretty melodies. I love how tumblr can be mundanemundanemundane and then suddenly you find a gem and it makes your night. I love how I can make myself laugh with the stupidest shit like saying, “I don’t have any arms” because I’m too lazy to type out, “I don’t have any pictures with my arms in them.” I love how loud that darn sunchips bag at my mom’s house is and how sneaky I have to be when getting out the Triscuits past bedtime. I love Jon & Kate Plus 8, even when it’s sad and they’re fighting. I love pizza from our favorite restaurant, hot and greasy, needing so many paper towels. I also love it for breakfast.

I love cheese and sparkly beverages and sandwiches. I love hair mousse and dress shirts and scrunchy sweatshirts and new belts and sexy underwear and hair clips. I love red headphones and loud music and dog walks and perhaps even school sometimes. I love cherry chopstick (except not when kissing a girl) and blue sharpies. I love this blog and the people who take the time to comment and the way I feel when I’m done writing it, like I’m helping sort myself out in this crazy world full of crazy people and their crazy happenings. I love pulling pranks on people. I love my friends and my family and I really love my dogs. I love all animals. I love owls and drawing and reading.

I love Owl City, just like I did last summer. I love how inspirational and optimistic every single one of his songs are. I love how each of Adam’s songs can remind me of some specific memory from last summer, random ones and silly ones and sad ones and every one in between. I love how he probably still is my favorite musical artist because we’ve been through more than The Shins and I have. I love how Vanilla Twilight literally causes me to scream the lyrics out loud and The Saltwater Room still sparks much discussion of which version is better. I love that I will always think the Ocean Eyes version is better because of that one second where he basically cooes, “ohallthetime.” I love that that is so obviously the song of the day.

I love this post, although it was actually quite hard to write. I love that I don’t care that it was almost a full hour of pure blog concentration. I just love it.

BEDJ 2010, represent!

BEDJ, BEDJ, BEDJ, are you ready for this?! I am kind of insanely excited this year. And I am going to be sticking with it, so don’t even try to doubt my blogging abilities. I think I managed to push through the ginormous metal wall that was standing between me and blogging a couple days ago, and now I can just typetypetype until my fingers get too fast for my brain and gibberish starts typing. Or something like that.

It’s 6:11pm and I’m sitting at the desk in my bedroom at my mom’s house, listening to a playlist that is about 95% Glee and 3 tracks of “Seasons of Love” and every time I look behind me, I can see this pretty sun-soaked tree out of my window and two weens lounging on my bed. This is my favorite part of being at my mom’s house, sitting at my desk and looking behind me at the sights. I really do love my room at my mom’s, it’s the perfect mix of muted and color, with brown weens every place and like 317 pens and pencils available for use. It’s awesome.

I’m sort of beginning to realize that there is a lot of stuff that you guys don’t know about me, because of my absence. And by “you guys” I mean the people who don’t generally comment, cuz the people who usually comment I talk to almost every day and so they know this stuff. But for those of you who are curious… let me enlighten you.

If you’ve been reading for a while, you’ll probably know that 1) owls are my favorite animal and 2) I love drawing them. It’s not really drawing as much as doodling, but I usually call it drawing. And for the past 58-ish days, I have been drawing, photographing, and editing a drawing of an owl every day. I hardly even remember how it started anymore, but it was decided that I’d send an owl to my friend every day through email and he makes them the background on his iPod touch. The whole thing is really fun and cool because I get to share my love of owls with someone and am forced to draw every day, which I think has made me better. For an example, you can click here to see our favorite.

Another thing is that I am absolutely addicted to this game for the iPhone/iPod touch called GodFinger. I literally started playing it this morning, well, at 12am today, and I played it for about three and a half hours while having a Skype call. For the first hour, I’m pretty sure I was no help to the conversation at all I did was giggle about the game. Oh well, it’s so darn addictive. And it’s free too, so I think that if you have an iPhone/iPod touch you should play it like… now. Or else I’ll slice your face off.

Gak, so, I love the part of blogging where you really get into it, where you are typing a mile a minute and the ideas keep coming. It’s even better when it’s an entry that you started out resenting having to make, and then it turns into some kind of excited and frantic jumble of words that are just hopping onto the screen. It’s such an empowering feeling, and I’ve missed it!

DUDE, I just realized, BEDJ last year, I had a song of the day. I’m totally doing that again. Song of the day: Seasons of Love (naturally) by the cast of RENT. Thank you, Michelle, for getting me addicted to yet another song.

magical sneezing ftw?

My elementary school best friend and I both have moms that have this date as their birthday. Every year, even though we don’t talk that much normally, we text each other to wish each other’s mom happy birthday. It’s the best tradition, really. It just makes me smile. 🙂

Speaking of texting, I silenced Twitter updates on my phone. It was a hard decision, but I got kind of tired of getting excited when my phone made that happy little “ding-ding!” and it was Twitter. I mean, I still read the updates on my desktop/phone client, so it’s not like I don’t care. And I can still direct message and send updates, but I feel a little more… free now, I guess. When I get a text, even though it’s less common, it’s actually a message for me. And then I get so excited. So, it’s worth it.

Have you ever written something in a notebook or on an index card or on the corner of some old math notes, and then looked back at it later and wondered what the hell it was? I found an owl scribbled in the margins of this old notebook from last year with the words, in cursive, “four weeks/28 days/4 Wednesdays/make it count”. I don’t know what this meant, why Wednesdays were significant, and if I did make it count, but I really hope I did. But don’t mistake my serious margin writing for what it naturally for me, on the previous page it says, “I LOVE AUDIOBOOKS SO MUCH WITH ALL MY HEARD AND SOUL FOR SERIOUS ZOMG LOL <3". Yeah. Sexay.

This notebook is brilliant, because it has twenty-five and a half owls drawn in it. This was in the spring of 9th grade, and when my owl obsession was completely insane. I miss those times sometimes. The notebook also has corny song quotes and things that say, "I love MInistry of Magic!" and "I just sneezed three times. It was magical." I'm sure it was magical, past self M-Dawg, I'm sure. 😛

People wonder why I keep all of my notebooks (ordered chronologically at my mom's house and by size/type at my dad's house, as they are stacked rather than aligned horizontally) from years and years ago. And it's because looking back on the ridiculously weird/cryptic/cute/snilarious/strange-ass things that I wrote or doodled is so much fun. It probably plays into one of the reasons I love psychology so much. I mean, I get to analyze my past self and they way she wrote or her voice in the writing or her handwriting or whatever, and see how I've changed, or in some cases, not changed. But some people, who don't really have notebooks outside of school ones, don't quite understand that. But, alas, it's their loss, really.

On another subject, I tried to play Sims 2 this afternoon to distract my thinking-thinking-thinking-like-crazay mind, but the old and rickety desktop that I use for gaming wouldn't respond to the monitor and it all turned to hell. Wow, that was a long sentence. But anyways, I was sad. And now I'm thinking about buying Sims 3 for my MacBook, but I'm not sure. It's 50 smackers, and I've heard some rumors about it not being as fun. But… the genetics! And the customizable clothing options! Guh, I dunno. What do you guys think? I hardly ever have homework anymore, and I need something to fill my time with. 😉

Alright, homesly, it’s time to go. I’m actually writing this at 5:41pm, and I’m off to order all of my Christmas gifts. Not my Christmas gifts, but the ones I’m buying for my friends and family. I’m a doofus. Later!

a brain overload.

Oh hai blog! I have missed you! What did you do with yourself in my absense? …oh shiz. Third sentence in and I’ve already made a sexual joke. That was unintentional, I promise. Oh you don’t believe me. *headdesk* Is it weird that I want to que an intro? As in a YouTube intro? I mean, I know it’s a blog. I am aware, believe me. Leave it in the comments! Marina, I’ll see you tomorrow! Don’t forget to rate and comment! Blah what is my brain doing? OVERLOAD OVERLOAD OVERLOAD.

Let’s just move on, shall we? So, obviously, I didn’t post a blog yesterday. I didn’t feel bad about it or anything, out of place or guilty, which is really good. I had spent about (*quickly does math in head*) ten hours working on a little masterpiece for the internet, so by the time I had finished and published and was completely done with the whole endeavor, I kind of just wanted to collapse in my desk chair, sign on to IM and watch a little good TV. So, if you missed me (HA!), I am very sorry. I did write this yesterday, though, so you can see how braindead I was.
I just had a total internal argument with myself about what to write in this blog. At first I wanted to tell you guys all about my day, but then I yelled at myself for “being so stupid, you’ll give it away!” as what I did with my day is a major surprise. But then I was like, “oh, well, by the time I post this it’ll be long past the surprise!” But then I realized the surprise never really ends and now I am forced to not talk about my day. What else can I talk about? Uh well, here. Do you guys remember about a week ago I was complaining about the strange muscle pain in my arms? Well, it’s happened again and I’m really trying to figure out why. But to NO AVAIL! That reminds me of a pretty kickass complaint letter that N-Dawg and I wrote. Remember that joyful day, N-Zizzle?
Guttural moans in songs make me laugh, really really hard.
And then it just ends. Do not even ask about that last bit, seriously.

I am getting a haircut tonight! It’s funny because Hazel got one today as well. xD But it’s not really anything drastic, I don’t think. Probably the same style but a little bit choppier. Who knows, maybe I’ll shave it off? How sexy would that be? Oh man, everyone would be so attracted to me. And I would have so many friends. I mean, think about it. I would have like 78,000 subscribers OVERNIGHT. They would just be so attracted to my prickley head. I need to stop talking about prickley heads, as it’s really freaking me out.

You guys, I am so happy. “Why, M, why are you so happy?” Awww, thanks for asking! It’s really appreciated. It’s actually no big deal, no squeeing over how awesome life is, although it is pretty awesome right now, but I am really happy because I got a gift on Monday. I got an OWL NOTEBOOK AND AN OWL PEN. Oh, guys, they are so nice. My mom’s ex-boyfriend saw them at a bookstore and thought of me so he bought them as a “good luck in your sophomore year!” kind of present. I’m using the notebook as a “awesome happy squeeish notebook of things that amuse me”. So far, there is an amazing quote about bananas and other things. =]

LOOK HOW CUTE THEY ARE.

PS. I’m sorry that this entry was a little bit chaotic, but I’m really giddy today, and sometimes things just come out as squee during these times. 😉

a post containing everything random.

Every time I click “new post” on wordpress, I immediately think of “owl post” and practically squee with Harry Potter excitement. I s’pose that’s why I’m such an awful blogger.
I have a habit of only updating my blog when I’m feeling rotten or absolutely happy or excited. That leaves my usual content mood neglected in terms of writing. If I only write when I’m feeling an extreme emotion, I will get into that habit and the karma gods will leave my content forever. Which isn’t awful, of course, but extreme emotions leave me feeling refreshed and a bit less numb. I feel as if I am rambling and making absofruitly no sense. ❤ Love love love.
I have this button that my good friend Beth gave me for my birthday that is just laying on my shelf and I want to put it on my backpack. Hold on readers. It looks really awkward and stupid. *sigh* I am real fidgety right now and all of these thoughts are shaking around in my brain and trying to be typed all at once and shut shut shut up thoughts. Where did my dad go? I’ve lost him! Oh, he went to the grocery. Wooo.
One thing I really love about my dad is that today, randomly, in the car, he said “whooo whoooo, owls!” That made me laugh a whole lot.
Okay, the red and yellow button on my backpack looked so ridiculous. My backpack is black, with green, pink, and purple polka dots on it. It clashed too much. So I took a black and white button off of my weekend messenger bag, put that on my backpack, and put the birthday button on my messenger bag. It’s totally nerd. I just found a black button that says “beware of dog” that my other good friend Elise gave to me in 7th grade after her trip to a Florida or something. I think it looks pretty kickass.

Okay so this photo was really hard to capture. If I tried to lay on my stomach, I had to wrap my legs around/under this shelf thing and ended up cracking my back pretty badly. So my legs/feet were forced into the photo. Ahh well. The things I do for this blog. 🙂
My favorite thing about my blog is that I don’t need to make a big giant statement or swear or … make bold statements or anything. Just sitting down and typing out my thoughts, as rare as it can be with school, is so powering. I don’t feel the need to be cool or witty or intelligent, just myself. ❤
DUDE CHECK OUT MY AWESOME NEW RANDOM!DOODLE NOTEBOOK.

I totally already drew an owl in it. And a turtle. And a monkey. ❤ …and wrote “owl” in mascara. The title of the notebook is: “Shhhh…” “Hooooot…” by Marissa Last!Name [a nerdy exploration of thoughts]
I LOVE CREATIVITY.
Ugh, I hate it when people IM me and I totally lose my train of thought because they need me to read their freaking blog right away because it is so damn crucial that they can’t wait until I read it later with all of the other blogs that accumulate throughout the day. MAYBE I AM DOING SOMETHING, HUH?! YEAH. MAYBE I AM PLAYING POKEMON OR WRITING A POEM OR KISSING A BOY. I HAVE A LIFE YOU KNOW. I am just kidding, I love my toasticle. ❤ [oh, I’d just like to add that the suggested spelling for “toasticle” on Firefox is “toastmistress”. I love the internet.]
I’d just like to say that I love the FiveAwesomeGirls together and seperately and nerimon and the Chamber of Secrets forum and NetNewsWire and all the aspects of my life that are contained in my shiny macbook and it’s glorious connection to my internet life.

Okay, so, this blog is going absolutely no where and I am a little bit ashamed but not really because who gives a crap? I’m happy happy happy despite the awfulness in my life and optimism is my best friend and I love focusing on the positive things in my life, not the negative and ahhhhh ❤
byebyeybyebyeybyeybyyebyebybyeybyeyyeybyyyye.

the owlery

Right about now I could apologize for not posting a blog entry in a few days, but I’m not going to. I purposely didn’t make any promises at the beginning of this blog. I don’t want this happy little blog to turn into something that’s a chore. It’s a place to express myself in a public manner, but I have to keep in mind that it’s not my only way of expressing myself. I twitter, I journal, I do a lot of doodles. I talk on the phone and I IM. I write monologues on my homework assignments. I ramble to my friends. There are so many ways of expression that I need to spread them out. Plus, as a high school student, I’m busy. I have homework to do and tests to study for and pop quizzes to anticipate. I have time lines to complete and essays to write. I have access assignments to do in computers class and daydreams to view. My whole life can’t be this blog. I don’t want it to fall under my massive pile of busy, but I don’t want to neglect my other interests, my other passions. That’s just the way it is.

Picture time!

Someone scared the little guy.

Look into his eyes, dangit, look.

A doodle I drew for my Weather Data project in Earth Science. I really hope I get an A.

My cousin-to-be drew this owl. And I think it is adorable.

❤ keep on being awesome, friends. And remember to always always brush your teeth. Because when you don’t, it’s just gross.